A nerd

Hello. I am a nerd. And so are you. Aww. I didn't just say that did I? You're a nerd, uh huh uh huh, you're a nerd. Whether it is because you love Lord of the Rings and have a LOTR tattoo (Go you!) or because you wee your cute little pants when you here the Imperial Theme (Go you!) or even if you are so wild about tricking out your car that you have a neon undercarriage and a TV mounted under the hood of your 1986 Chevy Celebrity, or you can recite every word to every disney cartoon ever made, you're a nerd. Everybody has some side of nerdom. For some people it is their love of music, for instance, the nerds that dance every time their phone rings Usher. For other people, it's movies (Like me). [Since I can't give you a good example of someone else's nerdom on this one, I'll put myself out there. I was so bored in 9th grade theatre class that I memorized all the best picture winners. I can't remember them all now, but I used to be able to recite it like nobody's business. Now I can only remember from about 1967 to now. Those ones before the 1960's were kinda iffy.]
We have all been the nerd in the car singing WAY too loud to 99 red ballons, only hitting the parts we know. Everybody.
So why do I bring this up? To bring you some comfort. And also to tell others that being a nerd is not a bad thing and it should not be held against us. I am a huge nerd. I sing way too loud way too much. I watch Star Wars and LOTR and live my life by the force, and I'm of the Jedi religion! (But I'm sorry fellas, I'm not a Star Trek fan, as much as BJB would like me to be, I avoided that bomber right then and there.) I love office supplies, I can fix computers and printers and copy machines and I love crafts, and I was a drama geek for more than 8 years of my life, and I watch both comedy cartoons and the Anime cartoons, and I own a graphing calculator, so I'm pretty much the geek of all geeks.
And I want you all to know, Nerd, Geek, Wanker, Weiner, Trekkie, none of those are bad words. (maybe trekkie.) But none of the other words are bad words. Embrace your inner nerdom. Embrace that nerdidty, and don't ever let anyone say, "You're such a fuckin' nerd." I'd be willing to bed $1,000 that says they have a closet obsession too. Like perhaps an incomprehensible love for Bill Nye, (or if you're from my generation, Mr. Wizard.) A person could drive a brand new BMW and listen to Busta and Dre bouncin down the street and have a Tattoo of the Pythagorean theorem. (Shit, most of the guys I knew in high school that were labeled as "nerds" are now making over $100,000 a year.) But somewhere in there, you've got a nerd. And I love nerds! I especially love people who can admit it. I love it. Because it makes you cool to admit you're a nerd in my book. You've laughed at that one joke, or once owned a shirt with a Christmas tree on it, or filled in those "Get to know you" emails that are circulated. Someone laughing? Fuck that shit. I'm a huge nerd and fuckin proud of it. Wanna make fun of me? Go ahead, then when you get home to your barbie collection, tell them all about it. I love my nerdom, and I love everybody else's nerdom. If that's what turns your crank, then so fuckin' be it.