Wont you give a bug a huggy

As much as I'm sure you all would love a real story about the duke of metal, I'm not gonna tell it. Someone with the initials JRRT did a pretty good job himself. Tonight I'm concerned with a bigger problem. Bugs. Little teeny tiny bugs. Some not so teeny tiny, but the smaller ones tend to annoy more than the big ones. I'm standing here at work, quite peacefully, until unbeknownst to me, a little tiny bug crawled up my leg and had dinner. Now I'm all for little homeless bugs chillin in my bedroom, or keeping warm in the corner, but when they have my leg for dinner, it's another story. Now I'm scratching the hell out of my leg with my dull tipped shoe, cursing the little bugger. (ha)

Then, yesterday, I was getting ready to get in the shower, and there on the shower curtain was this spider. But it wasn't a black widow or something that I could potentially kill with my shoe. No, this was spiderman. I'm not kidding you, we needed a baseball bat to kill that mofo. Now, spiders, if they are chillin in the corner, can live in my house anyday. But when they make the move on me, and want to start showering with me, that's another case altogether. Anyway, I'm not kidding you, this thing was about 3 inches long and about 1and1/2 inches wide. And it was pointy. It wasn't like a dorky little spider, this was a bad ass mofo. It jumped from the shower curtain over to the tile, and scared the bah-jeeeez-us out of me. I sprayed it with hairspray, it just hunkered down and beared it. Mom smashed it with MY shampoo bottle, and flushed that bastard down the toilet. And with my imagination, I still think he's down there waiting for the right time to come on up and bite my behind.
And right now you are all wondering, do I have a point? No. I just thought you'd like to know. And I thought I should remind you to give a bug a huggy. Just give a bug a huggy To-oo-day.