Thursday, November 17, 2005

What I'm thinking about right now:

If I have mistakes with my spelling or apostrophes, please don't judge me. I have some problems with my hand and my pinky is taped to my ring finger.

I have been thinking a lot lately about goals. I really don't care a lot about goals, and have never really felt a need to use them. Its complicated, but my goals are always too high, and I can't set them lower. But lately, I have been thinking about where I want to be. Because I don't want to be at this job, and I would like to move away from here. I like Charleston, but I'm ready to move. So that is my short term goal, to move.

isn't it funny how our goal terms vary in length and severity. My immediate goal is to finish this post. My next goal is to find something to eat. The goal after that is to get up and face work tomorrow. The next goal is to get a different job. The goal after that is to get new tires. The goal after that is to get a new apartment. The next goal is to move away and decide where to go. The goal after that is to get an education. The goal after that is to achieve my ultimate goal, which is "be on stage again."

interesting isn't it? I think until recently, I denied myself the ideal that I had goals. Ireland was a goal, but it is an eventual goal. "Being on stage again" is my ultimate goal. The problem I have with goals is, what if you don't make it? What if you fail your goal? Even the small ones. Then you fail right? And you tried your hardest, but oops, it was all in vain. What if you lived all your life to do one thing, and then at the last minute, it didn't work out, and you never had a chance to do it again. It seems black and white with goals. I dunno. And its not like i dont have goals, because i do. I have lots! but sometimes, it can be easy to feel tied down to these goals. its even harder when you dont have the means to acheive your goal. sometimes a person simply cannot pursue their goal because they dont have a way. yeah, some say, well if you want it bad enough, youd find a way. sometimes. Maybe i don't make sense.

Maybe these are just the ramblings of a girl who wishes she were more.

These are photos from the Tori song Winter. My mantra is in that song. And someone very close to me knows it well. Its a great song. Its a WONDERFUL album[Little Earthquakes]. I recommend picking it up. ok i'm done now.



what a great blog . i'm glad you found me .... i will be reading you as well!!

i don't think i could ever live in a place where there wasn't snow!


5:17 AM  

You made me think for a moment here of the neatest things I've learned about goals is that the best part of goals is the cliched 'journey' to them - I don't mean that to sound as corny as it does, but how we live our life and set about accomplishing our goals really is the fun part, even the way we attempt or don't attempt to reach completely unrealistic goals can be a life-long form of art in itself... Sorry if that sounds stupid, but it sounded good in my head while I was reading your post. :-)

9:52 AM  

I agree with you mike, looking for the goal, and searching is the fun part. But I have climbed highest mountains, run through the fields.... and i still haven't found what i'm looking for. I hope my journey continues to be fun, and hopefully gets better. And lets hope the times that get me down arent so bad i can't get back up.

11:00 AM  

It's good to have goals, but also to allow yourself the flexibility to change the goals if you need/desire to. You want to be on stage, that's a great goal to work towards! Maybe later in life you'll realize that you won't be on stage, or if you do make it, you won't stay on the stage. Maybe at that point, you can take what you know and your experiences and teach others who may be where you are now, to guide them towards their own goals?

It's just an idea, but I wanted to show how goals can change from what you wanted to what ended up working out the best way.

I wish you luck.

2:01 PM  

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