Thursday, May 25, 2006

Be my confidant

Hospitality, specifically hotels, is an interesting industry to be working in. Standing behind this desk people will say anything to you. They will say anything to get something for free, to make you laugh, get you to empathise, and they will say anything to end lonliness and frustration. I am a friend, a psychologist, a confidant, and a relative. I have something in common with most, and am willing to listen to everyone. I don't see it as much here as I used to at the Shitty Red Roof Inn, but it does pop up occasionally.

Today I was adjusting a woman's bill for her, giving her a rate I knew to be incorrect, but gotta make the guest happy, and we were talking about Colorado. I have limited information about Colorado, and my memories of it are slipping away from me. But I still like people to know that there are parts of my heart that belong there.

She was telling me how she had been to my hometown and how it didn't hold a very good memory. I jokingly said, "Yeah, I lived there for 20 years, my bad memories could rival the empire state." She got a giggle. She was mumbling something, and said her husband had died when she returned home from the trip to my hometown that evening. She said he laid down on the couch complained of a headache, she went to the kitchen to get him some aspirin, and when she got back to him, he was gone.

My point is why is she telling me this? I am a stranger! I'll tell you why, it's because i'm a friendly face in a strange place, and sometimes thats the only comfort one can find.

There was a man, Mr. Hicks, at Shitty RRI who was a resident of the hotel. When I say resident, I mean he paid rent every month. We became good friends over time, and he listened as I told him about wyoming, and I listened as he told me about how life was back in the day. This man gave without regret, and lived broke, which was how he liked it. He worked his ass off and all he asked for in return was a clean bed (which we provided) and a six pack of beer, which he provided himself. I never saw the man eat anything. Teeny little guy, too, but a heart bigger than Texas. If i were 45 years older, I probably would've loved him. He told me all about his wife who was a volunteer firefighter, and how he sat at her bedside during the last months of her life. He told me about how his house with all his posessions and memories of his wife was burned down by a pack of crackheads he gave a second chance. He came to me as a friend first, a customer second, and if it was late at night and i was alone, he would come in to the room and sit and talk with me. "Honey," he would say, (he always called me honey. I don't think he ever called me Elizabeth once, he knew my name, but always called me honey) "Honey, we gotta gitchoo a differnt job. You're too smart to be workin in this shitshingled hotel." He was my first and finest friend in South Carolina.

And that's what I'm saying. These people come to me in times of sorrow and joy, and I get to share it with them. I'm not just serving them for an instant. If i get pissed at a guest, i have to see them for the length of their stay, which sucks for both of us. It's a relationship. No matter how short, you create a relationship. And from that little relationship, you can create a friendship. I set up a wedding suite for 2 guests and I affected the rest of their lives. It was an amazing feeling. I mean really, a person does not forget their wedding night. I loved doing that, and they had no idea it was coming. I did that for 2 guests at red roof inn, it was their wedding night, and all they could afford was red roof inn, and they had booked 2 double beds. I went and cleaned a king for them, and lit a candle (all i could find) and went across the street to the gas station and got flowers for them. They will never forget it. That was our relationship.

My friend steve was visiting on a business trip that would change the rest of his life. He was moving down here, and he got the guts up to come and talk to me after i had checked him in and he had been to his room. It's the relationship that started it. I checked him in, friendly, and kind, started the hospitality relationship and that's what made him decide to come back down. Well, that and his friend over the phone coaxing him into it. He stood and talked to me for probably 4 hours, and watched me check people in. And from that instant he came back down to talk to me, a friendship was created. Even if he was just trying to hit on me, it was still cool. And from that minute relationship i created with him at checkin, we have this great friendship.

And since there is no where to sit, all of my friends are very good at standing.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Day 4

Day four of the no-soda diet. It's actually kind of okay. I'm not noticing withdrawl or the shakes or anything. I was a little cranky there for about 25 minutes, but that was work induced. It's kindof nice to be drinking lemonaide and sweet tea. And water, my goodness the hoover dam is envious of all the water i'm drinking. But my skin has already cleared up, and I haven't noticed a significant weight change, but a couple of situps and it'll probably melt away. I can't believe how quickly my skin cleared though. I thought i'd experiment and see if it was only soda that was muddling my face up, so I had some ice cream, and my conclusion is that yes, ice cream and milk are also responsible for the muddling.

Bitching time now. I got a letter from my apartment complex about the appearance of my apartment. I hung some purple curtains in my window, and they wrote me a letter telling me if i didn't take them down, they would fine me. FOR PURPLE CURTAINS!!!! I'm upset because I actually like these, and the shades that they make us have are ugly and depressing. We are only allowed to have white curtains. This sucks. White curtains, white walls, white bathroom, white carpet. well, not white carpet, it's that ugly off beige carpet that is standard in most apartments. But here's what sucks, how can they regulate what I put in MY apartment. I pay rent here, I should be able to hang what I want when I want. Same goes for the patio. We can't have a grill propped up out there, we can't use our grill out there, we can only have patio furniture, nothing else out there. It's bullshit!! For as much as we are paying, we should be able to paint the walls orange if we want. But no, we have to have the easily marked flat off beige color that is so depressing. And they actually PAY someone to drive around the complexes and write up people who break the rules. I mean, how do they know you have business clients, employees, or customers visiting. How do they know you're not having a dinner? And there has been this fuckin ugly red car sitting in the parking lot for over a month, in a GOOD spot, and it hasn't moved!!! No tickets/ towing like the sign says when you come into the complex. But god forbid a young lady hang purple curtains. JEEZ. If they find out about the penguin living in the freezer, there's gonna be hell to pay. God forbid they find out we have 3 cats instead of 2, and a turtle! Oh god life would be hell after that.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Goodbye My Love

Throughout my life, I have made several sacrifices. And most of the time it happened during lent. Today, I have decided for the final time that I am making a sacrifice of gigantic proportions. I'm tired of my face breaking out, I'm tired of the weight gain, I'm tired of my teeth with holes in them. Ladies and gentlemen, this is it. I'm giving up Pepsi. I'm not going to give up all soft drinks, the occasional fresca, or sprite will do me no harm, but pepsi and mountain dew and all the dark colored, or highly caffinated devil beverages are henceforth stricken from my diet.
I have holes in my teeth, and I have never had holes in my teeth until recently, and I'm not all that stoked about getting them paved over. My weight fluctuates depending on how much soda I drink, and if I have one too many 12 oz pepsi's, you can tell by looking at my skin. I'm tired of being lethargic or high on sugar. If i need a caffeine buzz, i'll drink a low caffeine tea, or sweet tea. Sweet tea is better anyway. So there. I'm ready to move on from the love of my life I call pepsi, I hope it doesn't resent me.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

My Body and the funny things it does

We all have little things about our body that are quirky or strange. For some it's the incredible amount of hair they have, for others, it's that their second toe is 1/4 inch longer than their big toe. For me, it's a bunch of things.

First off, let me say, this is not going to be a gross post. I'm not going to gross anybody out, we swears it. We swears. This is an informative post, because I know and you know, all of us have these little quirks. Not all are the same, of course, but we all have these quirks.

So the first quirk that comes to mind today is the thing that is bugging me today: My allergies. I'll say my food allergies, because my regular allergies aren't funny. My food allergies are Melons, and i'm developing an allergy to oranges, (and hopefully not lemons because they are my favorite fruit.) Ok, but it wasn't always like this. I used to eat watermelons by the whole. My friend and I used to take a watermelon and split it, and have contests. I LOVED watermelon. My favorite fruit as a matter of fact. And then one day, she and I were eating a watermelon, and whoops, suddenly I can't breathe, I can't see, and I'm breaking out in a rash. Well shoot. Maybe it's the watermelon. I'll try some cantelope (my second favorite food.) Oh! Hey! No airway, my eyes swell, rash again. Shoot. I must suddenly be allergic to melons!
And don't even think about putting me in a room with new carpet. That makes my right eye swell and some white goo come out of it. Yeah, found that out the hard way. "Yeah, we took Goddess to the carpet store, and she almost exploded." New carpet people. It's wierd. It's just wierd.

And now i'm becoming allergic to oranges. This makes me mad. Especially because my favorite oranges come from Kirby's grandma's backyard. Fresh orange tree, oranges the size of a softball, holy shit. It truly doesn't get much better than that.

Next thing are my feet. I've always had trouble with my feet. And for some reason, lately I've been having trouble with my left foot. But this week, it is my right foot causing anguish. Once again, Goddess has a bad toenail. I'll save you the nasty details, but sometimes this thing just needs to be pulled out of the side of my nail, and then it gets all red and bleeds. I've battled with this since I was about 15. The doctor "fixed" it 3 times and then once permanently on both feet, and it's better. But for some reason, the right foot just does not want to cooperate. It's quite frustrating let me tell you.

And then, there is the sickness. I had not been sick in a looong time (Mom and I figured about 8 years), bar food poisoning, but the other week, I got this terrible cold with a fever and all that jazz. What is the deal?! Why is my immune system fucking with me!? And i'm still not all the way over it. Sometimes i'll just be standing there and then suddenly my nose will plug up like a maniac!

I know this all seems silly, but this shit changes so quickly it's insane. I don't know what to do with myself. And I have to be careful what I take as far as cold medicines and pain relievers etc... so it can make being sick difficult.

On Sunday, I pinched a nerve in my back and became basically immoble. I thought it was cold air in my lungs, but no. Pinched nerve, pulled muscle type thing. It took me to my knees.

On Monday, monday was when my toe went to hell.

Tuesday, yesterday, I'm standing at work, doing fine, and suddenly, my appendix (asparagus) decided it was going to explode. It hurt bad enough i wanted to cry. My rockin' boss sent me to a room, and after a 20 mintue nap, I felt fine.

Today, I have all sorts of problems. Toe hurts, stupid orange allergy, and my elbow aches.

My conclusion:

Note: This was written on the 23rd of March, but I didn't think it was all that funny then. It's not what I wanted to write about today, either, but I am at work and didn't have a lot of time to write. Please forgive my absence, I'll be writing again soon. Happy mothers day!

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

It's Blogtastic!

Once again, i don't know how many times i'll say this during the life of this blog, but I'm sorry for the lack of posts everybody. I've been on a string of midnights, and I haven't been feeling so well. I'm feeling alright right now, i'm done with the string, so Cinderella can turn back into a beautiful pumpkin. Or something. So a new post is coming soon, just not tonight.

Not many people would post a picture like this. But these are sacrifices I am willing to make for y'all.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Lizard Queen, Revisited

Living in South Carolina has afforded me with some interesting experiences. I've held a shark by the gills, I've touched a 2000 year old tree, sat through hurricanes, and seen a bridge finished and two torn down all within a year. Just when I thought none of these things could be outdone, I woke up yesterday not prepared for the events to follow.

Yesterday was a day like any other. I went to work, came home, let the cats out on the porch, and got to work cleaning my room. The cats were all chillin outside, and mom was on the phone. I had nothing on the television, and I was trying to hang a lamp on my ceiling (I was standing on a stool on my bed) when, for some reason, I glanced over my shoulder at margie (my mom's Satan cat). She was walking from the living room by the kitchen, and had something in her mouth. I told her to spit it out, and psssst at her, but she didn't do anything.

I jumped off the stool and bed and ran over to her and caught her and told her to spit it out, whatever it was! I caught her in my mom's bathroom, and pulled the thing out of her mouth. It was a lizard. A little green lizard. Margie was scared and pissed that I had gotten a hold of the thing she was carrying, and ran away. I tried to catch the little bastard, but he ran up onto the sink, and then back down to the floor, and underneath the sink into one of the crannies under there. I closed the door, and laughed. My mom was strikingly calm, and this puzzled me. She then turned white and went, "what was that?"

I tried to find the little bugger in the crannies, but it was too dark and too late. So I closed the door and hoped that he wouldn't get out of the nook until later.

Cut to: Two hours later. My father arrives home, and mom says, "Tell your father what happened today." So, I said, ok. Went into the bathroom, looked around, checked the shower, sink, and ceiling, and said, "well dad, we had a little incident." He said, oh god, and his eyes were the size of dinner plates. I laughed and said, "Margie caught Larry the lizard, and wanted to share! She brought it into your bathroom and deposited him for you." My dad laughed, eyes still the size of dinner plates.

So that night passed, but we were all looking over our shoulder for this little creature we called Larry. I didn't want the cats to get him, I wanted Larry to survive. So that night before bed, I put out a little of Bea's banana in the bathroom, and mom and dad put a towel in front of the door, (so he wouldn't crawl into bed with them and cuddle) and we all went to sleep. I didn't really think another thought about it. He was out of sight, even after we dissected that freakin bathroom sink cabinet.

Next morning, I woke up and got ready for work and went back to bed (a daily ritual so I can get an extra 10 seconds of sleeping and if I over sleep I can wake up and go.) I was just dozing off again when Mom came walking into my room briskly, speaking rather loudly, "I FOUND LARRY." Apparently, lizards have a really high concern for tooth care. Mom found the little guy on top of her toothbrush in her drawer. I calmly, and drowsily, got out of bed and went to see the sight. In I walked into the bathroom, opened the drawer carefully, and there was Larry sitting atop a toothbrush happily green and looking at me! I said, "hi Larry." I then calmly told my mother, who was wringing her hands and dancing around like a little kid who had to pee, to get me a paper towel. I don't know a lot about lizards, and I don't know what kind of diseases they can spread.

So I got the paper towel, and I reached in, and I got hold of him, but he wiggled out. Darn it. I grabbed again, and he landed on the edge of the sink. I tried to grab him but he jumped all the way across the room to the shower curtain. So I moved to the shower curtain. I sorta got a hold of him in the paper towel, then the got out of the paper towel and started climbing on me. I was very calm, little lizards do not freak me out, but he was running around me like I was Mothra. I think that was about the time my mom started to dance. I finally got a hold of him in the little paper towel, and I was just calm and just stood there for a minute. He was chillin, I was chillin, he didn't poop, claw, or bite me, and I was okay with that.

I took him out to the balcony, and we are on the third floor so I thought, okay, I'll set him on the side, and he can crawl up the house, or down the house, and chill. I opened up the paper towel, and tried to kinda dump him out on the balcony railing. I opened the paper towel and he JUMPED off the balony and fell 3 floors, (aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa) and landed thunk on a little metal cover that was sitting on the ground. I yelped, I kinda gasped. Oh no! Larry!!! I came inside, forlorn that Larry had fallen to his demise, and mom said, "oh, is Larry okay?" I decided to find out.

I walked down the stairs, bummed that I was gonna have to bury Larry after ALL THAT, and went over to the little metal cover. I looked at Larry, very very closely, and he was brown. He had turned the color of the pine straw all around him. I looked even closer, and he blinked at me, and moved away. SWEET. I kinda gasped "oh. Larry!" Poor Larry had a long day. So I nudged him a little, and he moved into the bushes off to tell his friends about his evening. And I walked back upstairs glad that I hadn't killed Godzirra.